There is Chinese food and then there is Americanized Chinese food. Both can be delicious, but it's always good to know the difference between the two. To kick off Chinese Food Week, Girl Meets Food editor Mary Kong has graciously compiled a listicle to help you out.
Like many cuisines, authentic Chinese cooking has been bastardized over the decades. What Chinese people really eat at home—lots of vegetables, a sprinkle of meat, maybe some fruit—it's not glamorous, but it's simple comfort food. Everything is served family-style and everyone has a seat at the table. You won't see desserts on most Chinese menus. In fact, if you knew what we really ate at home, you'd probably turn green. Here's a list of popular Chinese dishes that are not really Chinese:
1) Crab Wontons: These deep-fried dumplings filled with crabmeat and cream cheese are popular...but nobody eats cheese in China. We're all lactose intolerant. But we do like to curdle other things, like fermented bean paste and duck blood.[photo]
2) General Tso's Chicken: Come on, this guy was too busy warding off rebellions to be cooking. This recipe is strictly American—chunks of chicken battered, fried and sweetened for Western tastes. No one in Hunan had even heard of this before 1970.[photo]
3) Chop Suey: Ah yes, the garbage disposal of the omelet world. Refrigerator scraps stir-fried and topped with an egg. It is said that some Chinese cook working during the Gold Rush served it as a personal "fuck you" to some drunk American miners.[photo]
4) Pu Pu Platter: Everything about this appetizer is an affront to poor people. It's nothing but fried, greasy egg rolls, spare ribs, chicken wings and beef teriyaki—which isn't even Chinese![photo]
5) Sweet 'n' Sour Pork: Chunks of pork, battered, deep-fried and slimed in a thick orange sauce. There are obvious Southern barbecue influences here.[photo]
6) Sweet 'n' Sour Chicken: Chicken gets the same treatment, but it's all white meat because somehow that makes it better. With pieces of pineapple to assuage your guilt.[photo]
7) Salad: We cook our food. When dysentery is a concern, you would too.[photo]
8) Egg Rolls: Does anyone eat these? These thick-skinned, blistered rolls that look like Linda Blair's face in The Exorcist are nothing like the real Chinese spring rolls, which are smaller, thin and crispy—and edible.[photo]
9) Beef and broccoli: There's really nothing wrong with this dish, except that we don't have Western broccoli in the East.[photo]
10) Fortune cookies: Another ploy to amuse Westerners, these flag-bearers of fortune don't even tell you good news anymore, only your closely guarded shortcomings. Chinese people eat something more fortuitous for dessert: oranges. They're good luck.
"My friends and I were eating and a RAT fell from the ceiling onto my shoulders. I felt something but didn't realize it was a RAT until the waitress next to me screamed and ran away...The Rat ran around on the table until someone from kitchen came out and dusted into a dish tray. What made it worse was that they killed it right away with kitchen utensils after they brought it into the kitchen. The manager came over and offered us to seat in another table....but seriously? Who would ever want to eat here after this encounter? I have no idea how this restaurant passed the health inspection."
To quote a friend, "It's been eating Chinese food for days!" Here are some reaction quotes from my close friends...
Unfortunately, when the Chinese travel they do not know how to act. This applies mainly to the Mainland Chinese who are a little more crude and rude. For example, It asked Chinese Nationals to comply with non-smoking areas and not to throw rubbish or shout in public. It also warned against the annoying habit of forcing locals to take their photos. In addition, the guide advised travelers to keep their nose-hair neatly trimmed. Additionally, the guide warned Chinese visitors to Germany to only snap their fingers to beckon dogs, not humans.
In response to this behavior, China's National Tourism Administration have publicized a 64-page guidebook on their website, entitled "Guidebook for Civilized Tourism," advising Chinese nationals not to pick their noses in public, urinate in pools or steal airplane life jackets, according to a report by news agency AFP on Wednesday.
Samsung is giving its phones a fresh new paint job! Making a play at Apple. I think the all gold phone on the left looks better than the all Gold iPhone.
My predictions on the All Gold iPhone 5S were correct.
"A rumor has been brewing online that Apple released its gold-colored iPhone 5 in a bid to cater to the preference of Chinese people. If it is true, then the tech giant definitely made a right move.
Targeted at emerging markets, the iPhone 5c has few buyers in China.
While the official prices of iPhone 5s are identical to the iPhone 5 previously sold in China, where the low-end 16GB model is priced at 5,288 yuan (US$864), if you want a gold-colored iPhone 5s from the grey market today, you'll need to pay 10,000 yuan (US$1,634) or more for it today, according to aXinhua news report. "
China's Shenzhen proposes an idea to fine people who piss on toilet seats...Good idea in theory possibly? But how would you feel if you're job was to check if people pee'd on seats? Only in 中国 aka China!
To cut costs a Chinese Zoo substitutes a giant Mastiff in place of a Lion. When people call them out they use the excuse that the Lions are at another facility breeding...
Gotta love cheesy Chinese Wedding photos
1) Crab Wontons: These deep-fried dumplings filled with crabmeat and cream cheese are popular...but nobody eats cheese in China. We're all lactose intolerant. But we do like to curdle other things, like fermented bean paste and duck blood.[photo]
2) General Tso's Chicken: Come on, this guy was too busy warding off rebellions to be cooking. This recipe is strictly American—chunks of chicken battered, fried and sweetened for Western tastes. No one in Hunan had even heard of this before 1970.[photo]
3) Chop Suey: Ah yes, the garbage disposal of the omelet world. Refrigerator scraps stir-fried and topped with an egg. It is said that some Chinese cook working during the Gold Rush served it as a personal "fuck you" to some drunk American miners.[photo]
4) Pu Pu Platter: Everything about this appetizer is an affront to poor people. It's nothing but fried, greasy egg rolls, spare ribs, chicken wings and beef teriyaki—which isn't even Chinese![photo]
5) Sweet 'n' Sour Pork: Chunks of pork, battered, deep-fried and slimed in a thick orange sauce. There are obvious Southern barbecue influences here.[photo]
6) Sweet 'n' Sour Chicken: Chicken gets the same treatment, but it's all white meat because somehow that makes it better. With pieces of pineapple to assuage your guilt.[photo]
7) Salad: We cook our food. When dysentery is a concern, you would too.[photo]
8) Egg Rolls: Does anyone eat these? These thick-skinned, blistered rolls that look like Linda Blair's face in The Exorcist are nothing like the real Chinese spring rolls, which are smaller, thin and crispy—and edible.[photo]
9) Beef and broccoli: There's really nothing wrong with this dish, except that we don't have Western broccoli in the East.[photo]
10) Fortune cookies: Another ploy to amuse Westerners, these flag-bearers of fortune don't even tell you good news anymore, only your closely guarded shortcomings. Chinese people eat something more fortuitous for dessert: oranges. They're good luck.
via - http://store.apple.com/us/buy-iphone/iphone5s
Via: Ryan Lee & http://www.buzzfeed.com/nataliemorin/chinese-signs-that-got-seriously-lost-in-tranlsation
